Ode to the hot dog: Humble king of street food. Not pretending to be what you're not. Elongated sausage in a narrow bun. Simplicity. Human nature. Family unity. The sun is beating down on the stadium and my team is losing, but what does it matter when I have you? Tourist trap. I paid $20 for you in Times Square and let me tell you, you left a lot to be desired, but the memory of being ripped off for a sausage will stay with me forever. I should have gone to Nathan's. We love you as much in your food form as we do in your dog form. Invented in Europe, made into a rock star in the States. A bite of pleasure, with extra mustard please. I hope someone loves me as much as Joey Chestnut loves you. I'll be thinking of you.